Archive for the Travel Category

Exemplification

Posted in Travel on March 26, 2009 by themaroon

As I write this, I’m sitting on a plane heading back from a much needed respite in Las Vegas. For the first time since starting Blue Frog Gaming I took a little time to totally unplug from the startup. The closest I came previously was my honeymoon, though even then I would sneak down to the main concourse daily, laptop in hand, to answer emails at the cruise ship internet access rate of $73 per minute.

But this time I ignored the inbox and, except for a brief conversation with a good friend who is also one of our investors, forcefully vanquished every thought about how to improve virality with better mini-feed messaging or increase conversions by delaying install buttons. I can’t say the thoughts didn’t keep popping up like plastic moles at an arcade, but I kept hammering them back down with my mental rubber mallet.

I had lots to keep me occupied out there anyway. From the moment we got to town we were assaulted by the city’s overwhelming despair in light of the new economy. Gambling is said to be recession-proof, but the casinos have spent the last 10 years moving away from their proverbial bread and butter and toward other sources of revenue like restaurants (literal bread and butter), real estate, and shopping. The combination of spring break and March Madness had occupancy rates at 2007 levels, but everybody knew it was temporary. You could see in their eyes that next week they’d be back on their couch watching daytime talk shows instead of collecting tips.

We rented a condo at The Signature, three new Turnberry-managed towers attached to the MGM, where I had once seriously considered purchasing a suite. When the owner let us into the room, I asked her all about the market and she told me the story with what I could only describe as quiet resignation. It truly made me sad to see it. This wasn’t a parasitic AIG executive sucking at the teat of society. She wasn’t a subprime borrower wanting to live in a much nicer place than her income afforded her. She was a real person who made an investment that, by many, would have been considered a good bet.

She’d bought a condo in the hottest real estate market in the US as an investment, hoping that occupancy rates would remain at least reasonable. Common wisdom at the time (which had been true since long before most of the town’s residents had left their snowy climates to deal blackjack at the Bellagio) was that no matter how many rooms the city built, tourists would fill them. She’d hoped that over the long term a combination of appreciation and rental revenues would provide her with a little something to help retire on. Now she’s frantically listing the place on sites like Craigslist, trying to recoup the mortgage (which from my estimates wouldn’t happen even with a 100% occupancy rate) or at least some portion thereof.

She’d taken the same sort of gamble “experts” have been saying was the best way to build wealth for decades, and now she’s in serious trouble because of it. Units that sold originally in the $600k-$750k range are now listed online at $175k, and I hear have been purchased for even less. These people are being crushed, having lost hundreds of thousands, and unsurprisingly many of them are filing bankruptcy, pushing the losses off to the banking system, whose lack of due diligence makes it hard to feel sorry for them. But as an entrepreneur, it really saddens me to see anyone who isn’t a competitor getting smacked upside the head for trying, so I felt bad enough for the owner that I tried to do a little extra room-cleaning before we left.

Meanwhile across the street at City Center, which is the most expensive non-governmentally financed construction project in history by a factor of three, there isn’t a worker to be seen. The lawsuits and other acts of general desperation have already begun to flow over that one, with pretty much everyone involved either scraping for the cash and/or credit needed to complete it or trying to back out entirely. MGM has begun selling off casinos just to keep construction moving, and nobody knows how far they’ll have to go to stay afloat. It’s a bet-the-farm project for a company who, like every gaming conglomerate, has a share price graph that looks like an inverted “V”, and the people with the chips are asking the dealer if surrenders are allowed.

The first condo-hotel opening there will be the ridiculously-named Vdara. My wife says they purposely made the title as close to that of female genitalia as they could get away with. If so, it’s ironic that they chose the body part they did since the whole project is a giant hole that’s threatening to sink their company faster than its namesake did Alex Rodriguez‘s reputation.

The guy at the sales center in MGM said its only 60% sold just a few months shy of opening. If memory serves me (and I’ll check my email records to confirm) The Signature was well over 90% this close to game time. They’re still asking half a million or more for units, which the sales rep admirably managed to tell me without laughing. Good luck with that one guys. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the units sold are already in foreclosure. If the complex ever does get finished, which is not a foregone conclusion, unless something in the sales contract forbids it there will probably be units on the resale market competing against direct sale units three times as expensive.

In many ways, seeing what’s happening to the town brings me great sadness. It’s hard for a human to feel more kinship for a city than I do with Las Vegas. In a lot of ways, she and I grew up together. While I don’t expect it to be the defining period of my life, my time as a professional poker player will probably go down in my memoirs as my formative years, and a big chunk of it was spent on The Strip.

It’s looking like it will be recalled as her golden years as well. Residents a decade from now will talk about the days when easy credit and irrational exuberance brought tourists in faster than all the money in the world could be used to accommodate them. Buildings costing in the 9 figures (or more) sprung up faster than cacti after one of the two annual rainy days. There was an influx of job-seekers from the all around our country and the world probably unlike anything seen since the golden era of Detroit. Anyone with the manual dexterity needed to shuffle a deck was guaranteed a healthy middle class salary, executives were minted faster than poker chips, and the housing market exploded along with both. Even now, it’s hard to find anyone in Las Vegas who actually grew up there.

Watching the casinos cut staff, restaurants and clubs shutter, and buildings languish half-finished is sort of like seeing your college buddy get laid off, except at least you know your buddy will rebound eventually. Las Vegas probably won’t sink as far as Detroit, but it also probably won’t ever be what it was back when I was spending one week a month living out of the Bellagio. They can finish all of the condos named after reproductive organs, maybe even build the whole City Center project and a few more unnecessary casinos to boot, but they’ll never get back the optimism that was Las Vegas’s greatest natural resource for the last 50 years.

Nonetheless, much like the rest of the nation these days, though things seem to suck for everyone else they’re pretty damn good for those of us whose lives continue on unabated. I often feel guilty about just how much further my money goes now, or at least about enjoying it so much.

For less than half of what I used to pay at Bellagio, you can now rent a brand new suite, located just far enough from The Strip to avoid the annoyance of dopey tourists bouncing around aimlessly and stopping to look at every shiny object in a store window that they will never in their lives be able to afford, but still close enough to get there with a brief people mover-assisted walk. The cost of a rental car is more than recouped by the ability to buy food for breakfast and lunch at Whole Foods and bring it back to the kitchenette.

I was also able to get third-row tickets to “O”, a show I’ve wanted to see for over five years now but have previously never been able to due to my inability to plan anything more than three days in advance. This time three days was more than enough. The only other people in town were spring breakers, who couldn’t afford the ridiculous ticket prices (which would be unjustifiable for any show in the entire history of humanity but that one) and March Madness fans, who are too busy getting drunk on $2 Bud Lights at a sports book and rooting for their parlays.

“O” was, perhaps, the most fascinating thing I’ve ever seen, in fact, I’m still not sure it actually happened, let alone occurs twice nightly as billed. I think there’s just some hallucinogenic gas pumped into the theater, and then a guy with those swirly mesmerizing glasses comes on stage and tells you the story, because what I saw was simply an impossible sum of many only marginally-possible parts. It wasn’t even so much the acrobatics, which were impressive, but the logistics.

There’s a theater with a 25 foot deep pool holding 1.5 million gallons of water in the middle of the desert, the floor of which can be raised and lowered quickly, in sections, without causing a wake. There’s a wall of air separating it climatically from the audience. There are various contraptions in the ceiling that people swing from, all of which can be moved in multiple dimensions, a cast of 85 world-class athletes (many of whom are Olympians) wearing costumes that cost as much as $10,000 and have to be replaced every two weeks. The show, if it really exists, and I’m skeptical (note the lack of videographic evidence) cost $100 million to get running, which is about the same as Terminator 2 but without any hope of selling DVDs.

When you think about it all rationally, it just doesn’t add up. It’s not possible. But if it were possible, it would only be so in Las Vegas. Nowhere else could someone spend that kind of money on a theater with only 1,800 seats and one show, and have it end up one of the best gambles ever made. Walter Mathau once said about poker that it “exemplifies the worst aspects of capitalism that have made our country so great”. He was close, but Vegas, with its $11 billion casinos and shows that cost more than a skyscraper in most cities, beats it hands down.

Cruzan

Posted in Travel on July 15, 2007 by themaroon

I’m on my cruise ship, waiting to embark. Every time I’m on one of these I marvel at their efficiency. Every Sunday they manage to get 2,000 people, and their waste, off of the boat, then get that many more people and supplies back on in less time than it takes my wife to do her makeup. I realize they do some of the supply work while in port, but still, it’s impressive.

I’m also amazed at how thorough they are. These things are basically floating towns, with their own little economies. They have doctors, jails, shops, and pretty much everything else one needs. The only thing different about a cruise ship and the city I live in is the ratio of bartenders to civilians. It’s the kind of place a man could get used to.

It’s also neat to see what completely unrestrained capitalism looks like. There’s no competition on board, so the only factor in their pricing is how many customers will buy a given product at a certain price. I guess if it got too outrageous they might lose some repeat business, but given the $7 charge for a Miller Lite, I don’t think the people who run it are cognizant of that. They just take each price point, multiply it by how much they’d sell there, and then compare.

It’s supposed to rain pretty much every day we’re in port. That I can handle, so long as it doesn’t keep us from swimming with the dolphins. That’s pretty much what I’m looking forward to the most. In fact, the only reason I’m working on this startup is so that one day, just maybe, I can have a pet dolphin. I’m going to have to strike it pretty big for that, I know, but if Hugh Hefner can have a whole zoo, why can’t I just have a few aquatic mammals?

I’ll also want some sharks for the moat, but that’s a topic for another time. I’ve got a life jacket seminar to attend.

Boston

Posted in Travel on May 1, 2007 by themaroon

I had a fun trip to Boston. Actually, let me rephrase that. I had a good time in Boston. The journey there was about as fun as getting an appendectomy from a homeless guy with a rusty spoon. 10 hour drives should be made illegal just so idiots like me don’t ever try them.

Also, if you aren’t familiar with the city and you’re considering driving around it without GPS, do yourself a favor. Take a sharp stick and poke yourself in the eye. I promise you, it will be more pleasant. I’ve never seen such a poorly laid out town in my life. I realize those roads were all formed back during the horse and buggy days, but it’s 2007. Seriously guys, it’s time to just set up a grid and call it a day. Even with navigation I was unable to find Harvard Yard so I could park the car.

I noticed on the mbta website that there’s actually a job lottery. I’m no economist or anything, but it seems to me that if a job is so popular that people want to win it, it might pay a bit too much. You’re supposed to play lotteries so you can get rid of your job. I’m not even looking for employment but I figured if it’s that great, maybe I should try, so I went around the whole city buying scratch-off tickets. I didn’t get a job, but I did win more scratch-offs so at least it wasn’t a total loss. Until those tickets came up empty, that is. Then it was.

Sunday night we had dinner at Morton’s, since I had a gift card. Everything was fantastic except for the butter. That’s a huge problem when you order a giant lobster. I’ve never come away from a meal that cost more than $8 feeling the experience was ruined by a bland condiment, but I guess there’s a first time for everything. The upside-down apple pie was heavenly at least. I always did like my food inverted.

We stopped at a little shop on Beacon Hill and bought some imported chocolate. As we were paying the guy put a little pamphlet into the bag and said “here is the story behind your chocolate.” That made me happy because I also like my food to have a plot. I just hope the characters aren’t the usual broadly-drawn archetypes that come with candy. Like Bazooka Joe, what the hell is up with that guy? He just goes around blowing stuff up. That’s absurd. I want to know why he’s so violent. Did he have a bad childhood? Is he trying to change but still hanging out with all of his bazooka friends who are unsupportive of his decision? They just never tell you, so I really can’t get into the gum.

Also I had the same realization that I have every time I travel, which is that whoever invented the hand dryer they put in bathrooms should be hung for crimes against humanity. Somehow this invention, which is less effective than just waving your hands around in the air, has convinced morons that it’s ok not to provide paper towels. Making me dry my hands off on the fabric in my pockets has to be at least treason. If not I just don’t see the purpose of law.

Walking out of a rest stop on the highway there was actually a guy with toilet paper hanging out the back of his pants. I had always assumed that the logistics involved rendered that impossible and that it was just something you saw in bad 80′s movies. Of course as I reached into my pocket for my Treo to take a picture for my blog (what else is there for a civilized person do in that position?) I realized I had left it in my car. That may very well be the first time in 5 years I was in public without my cell phone on me, and sure enough there’s a fat guy with toilet paper streaming down his backside. Talk about a Kodak Moment.

In that very same rest area someone had written on a door “Nappy Headed Ho” and below that someone else had etched “I’ll be back. Love, Imus.” I definitely didn’t expect any free speech rants in a turnpike toilet stall. Luckily the somber tone was broken by the good old “for a good time call…” message. I really need to start carrying a pocket knife in case I ever come across any such witticisms while dropping a deuce on the expressway. There’s nothing worse than coming up with the ultimate bon mot and being unable to carve into an aluminum door.

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