An Open Letter To Parents Everywhere
I’m not one of you, so I won’t pretend to understand what it is like to be one. I don’t know what it’s like to see your child suffer and want to help or prevent that. Pretty gut-wrenching and enormously stressful I’m sure. And I know you probably mean well.
But don’t take medical advice from Jenny McCarthy, or, for that matter, any Playboy Bunny, past or present. Take medical advice from doctors. They go to school for 6+ years, then do 3 years in residency. Jenny McCarthy went to school for a year or two, then got breast implants and dropped out. Doctors have, at their fingertips, the collective knowledge of thousands of years of medical science. Jenny McCarthy has the collective knowledge of a door handle and a piece of lint.
I’m not sure what’s a bigger tragedy, that children are born to someone dumb enough to believe there’s a link between autism and vaccines even though every piece of evidence suggests otherwise, or that children are born to someone dumb enough to take medical advice from a stripper. Or maybe it’s the resulting outbreak of measles, a disease previously eradicated from the first world but which is causing even the children of parents smart enough to know that Jenny McCarthy is a useless bitch to get the disease as well. I’m going to go with door number three.
I guess it puts the whole global warming “debate” in perspective. It sounds ludicrous that people would pay attention to the scientific opinions of Bill O’Reilly, but compared to those who take medical advice from someone whose breasts can be seen on Google Images, those people are fucking Einsteins.
Someone Who May Have Kids One Day and Doesn’t Want Your Dumb Ass Causing Them to Get Measles