MattMaroon.com

I wasn’t a big fan of Christmas for a long time. I’m not sold on the whole son of God thing, and I hate trying to buy people gifts. I’d say I’m a mediocre gift giver. I’m not the best, but I’m not one of those people whose every gift ends up at Goodwill or buried in a basement either.

When I was a kid Christmas was great. Each one was better than the next. But then one Christmas my brother and I wanted a Super Nintendo and my father swore up and down for months that we weren’t going to get one. We believed him and then, of course, found it under the tree that morning. Obviously it turned out to be the greatest gift ever because really, I think, it was the best game system ever, and to a kid from my generation those two things are synonymous. And that’s pretty much when Christmas peaked for me. Since then it’s all been down hill.

Until Starbucks invented the chai eggnog latte, that is. Suddenly there’s a reason for the season once again. Each one is like a Super Nintendo in a paper cup. It takes two of the tastiest beverages known to man and combines them into a whole that’s somehow even greater than the sum of its parts.

The chai eggnog latte makes all of the annoying music and crowd-fighting worth while. Something still has to be done about those damned Salvation Army assholes ringing their bells, but you can’t expect Starbucks to fix everything I guess. They’re just one little coffee shop trying to bring meaning back to a holiday that’s become more a celebration of capitalism than anything else. They’re the true heroes of Christmas.